Freedom to Change Course

I've been bumping into a theme in the books I'm reading and the messages I've heard preached lately. It's the idea of "change-ability."

I was reading some Kierkegaard in the car (during a fantastic road trip from which I just returned), and he had a beautiful passage on the famous bible story involving Abraham, God, and the command to sacrifice Isaac on the altar. He came at it from a pretty unique angle. Usually I think of how hard it was for Abraham to take his son, tie him up on the altar, and pull out the knife. I always imagined the relief that Abraham must have felt when God broke in at the last second and screamed for Abraham to put down the knife and spare Isaac. Kierkegaard, however, turned things around and highlighted how difficult it must have been for Abraham to actually put down the knife. Think of it - Abraham had heard the voice of God, commanding him to sacrifice his son, and then when he set out to complete the divine mission, he hears a voice telling him to stop. How easy it must have been to label the second voice as the tempter's voice instead of God's. Of course, that couldn't be God telling him to turn around at the moment of decision - especially commanding the very thing he naturally wanted to do - to spare his son. But Kierkegaard points out that Abraham was so in-tune with the "present" voice of God that he successfully recognized it as the voice of Jehova and not that of the enemy.

So often, we hear a word from God and run with it... not bothering to wait and see if things will change. Was it really God who told Abraham to kill Isaac? Yes. Was it also God who told Abraham to spare Isaac? Yes. When God speaks, it does not mean that the orders will never change. The same God who said "A" also said "B", only a few hours later. How difficult it is to follow the Unpredictable God. Kierkegaard speaks of Abraham's ability to "retain, even at the last moment, the... agile willingness of an obedient soldier. Such a one, even when he has almost reached his goal, does not mind having to run back again, even if it renders all his running in vain. Oh, this is great!"

Within the same few days, I came across an interesting passage in the gospels where Jesus walks out this ability to change course suddenly. In Luke 22:35-38, Jesus speaks to his disciples before his betrayal.

'And he said to them, "When I sent you out without money belt and bag and sandals, you did not lack anything, did you?"
They said, "No, nothing."
And he said to them, "But now, whoever has a money belt is to bring it along, likewise also a bag, and whoever has no sword is to sell his coat and buy one. for I tell you that which is written must be fulfilled in Me, that 'he was numbered with transgressors'; for that which refers to me has its fulfillment."
They said to him, "Look Lord, here are two swords."
And he said to them, "it is enough."'

Just a few weeks earlier, Jesus had sent his friends out to heal the sick and drive out demons, with only the clothes on their backs. As they followed his instructions, they were supernaturally provided for and "did not lack anything." The formula was working great for their ministry. But now, Everything was different. It's almost as if Jesus was saying, "remember what I told you a few weeks ago? Well, forget it. There's something new I need from you now. Those money bags and belts and swords I had you give away... you might want to get them back. You'll need them soon."

What an inconsistent Shepherd! And yet, there is divine wisdom behind the madness. They had no need of coats and money belts precisely because their message dealt with miraculous healing and deliverance. The favor of the people was on them. Of course the crowds provided the disciples with food and lodging - they were healing the sick all over town! But when Jesus' message began to change from "bring me your sick" to "by the way... I'm God and I have a Kingdom," the favor of man crumbled beneath their feet. When the message became offensive, the crowds began to number the disciples not as "heroes," but as "transgressors" (vs. 37). Jesus knew that in the coming season, when the crowds were offended, the free meals would come to an abrupt halt. Hence, the sudden necessity of a money belt and an extra coat.

Again, the same God that says "A", suddenly turns around and says "B". The reason this is both glorious and annoying is that it makes formulas impossible. Relationship is necessary. The fact that I heard God yesterday has very little to do with my hearing him today. When following Jesus, things change - and they change suddenly. This is difficult! Kierkegaard laments that "when a person has for a long time been saying 'A', then humanly speaking he is rather bothered at having to say 'B'".

With so many twists and turns, how are we supposed to get used to following God? We aren't. God never does the same thing twice. Jason Upton says it well when he stresses that "God is calling for a beautiful people who are unpredictable." Our freedom to change and grow reflects a God who is new every morning. Hans Urs Von Balthasar describes God as "the free and infinite Person who, from the depths of his freedom, can give himself in a way that is ever new, unsuspected and unpredictable." He goes on to say that "the word of God is never something finished, to be surveyed like a particular landscape, but it is something new every moment, like water from a spring or rays of light. And so it is not enough to have received 'insight' and to 'know the testimonies of God' if we do not continually receive and become inebriated by the fountain of eternal light. The beloved's face and voice are every moment as new as if he had never seen them before. No seraph, no saint in all eternity could 'get used' to it."

God's words over our lives are never meant to bind us into a formula or cause our hearts to harden like cement. We need to be running in such a way that we are willing and able to stop on a dime, turn 180 degrees, and begin sprinting wholeheartedly in the new direction, all the while keeping our ears ready to hear the inevitable voice of change.